Twincest
by justtheone2
Summary: Twincest. Just that one word is enough to make fangirls squeal and others mutter in disapproval. What they don't see is the painful, controlling side of it. My name is Eri and this is my story. Sequel: I'm Ran, a tomboy. My dad and uncles fault i suppose.
1. Beautiful

Twincest. Just that one word is enough to make fan girls squeal and others mutter in disapproval. If I hadn't been a twin myself then I think I would have been one of those squealing. After all, it's a girl's dream for a twin to look her way, isn't it?

What those fan girls see is either an act or the twins actually in love with each other. What is often forgotten and ignored is the painful, controlling side of it. Most twins don't have this side to them and simply rely and care about each other. But the minority suffer at the hands of their one twin.

My name is Eri, and what you're about to read is my own story. The ending is not yet written and the pages are bare and torn, but one day it'll have have a happy ending, or possibly a tragic end. My fate lies in the hands of God and those around me. What they choose to do will decide my end.

My twins name is Hisoka, meaning 'reserved' and ever since our parent's death he has been just that. Although we are not identical, we share the same hair, skin and eye colour. He is about 2 inches taller than me and is rather handsome. Our eyes are a piercing blue, said to look haunting yet angelic. Our hair is dark brunette, often mistaken as black, and it contrasts with our pale skin.

Our parents died after being attacked on their way home from work. We were rich at the time and many people knew of us. The ones that attacked them had been desperate for money, starving. We were 5 at the time and despite many social workers trying to take us into care, our housekeeper and maids used some of the money from selling the mansion to buy a small cottage and insisted that they would watch over us. In the end the social workers gave up and left them to it. But slowly, one by one, the maids found boyfriends and moved out and when just the housekeeper was left the stress got too much for him and after a second heart attack, he moved away. At fourteen we were left to fend for ourselves with the money that our parents had left us and the money from the mansion. It was a lot but it was a lonely life.

I'm pretty sure that's how we ended up how we are today. With me scared to be at home and my brother obsessive and protective. And that's why I find myself running through Ouran academy. We don't attend this school but I found it was the best place to go while Hisoka was in a bad mood. The many rooms meant it took him hours to find me and although it meant my punishment would be greater, I felt peaceful in my small amount of time away from him.

"AHA! A room I haven't been in yet" I thought as I saw the sign saying "Music Room 3". Paying no attention to the six boys and one girl inside, I ran straight in and vaulted over a sofa on the other side of the room. Within seconds I heard the door open again and a familiar voice ask if a girl of my description had come in hear. After a chorus of "No, no ones here but us." Hisoka left again and I peered over the back of the chair. What I saw were four head directly in front of me. Two blondes and a pair of twins with red hair.

"Erm...Hi." I was the first to break the silence as I stood and straightened out my clothes.

"Although we have the guests at this moment, I would greatly appreciate it if you didn't use our club room for your game of hide and seek. Do you even attend this school?" A boy with glasses said not looking up from his laptop.

"Hahaha" I laughed nervously, scared that he would hand me in to my brother. " No don't attend this school, and I'm not playing any game. I'm hiding from that idiot that you thankfully got rid of."

"Why are you hiding from him? He's not the mafia is he?" The tall blonde said dramatically while grabbing hold of my shoulders. Memories flashed before my eyes as I screamed and struggled out of his grip. With a look of horror he hid behind the girl standing near the glasses guy.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to scream. No he's not the mafia. He's my dumb ass twin brother." I mumbled while folding my arms defensively.

"Your twin? Why would you run from your own brother? And what are your names?" Glasses guy was talking again. Did he ever look away from that laptop?

"Long story. Our names are Eri and Hisoka Ogawa." Why did I feel like I was being interrogated? Oh wait. I was.

"Eri-chan?" A small voice came from behind me. I turned to see a small boy holding a pink plush rabbit. Usa-chan?

"Honey?" It couldn't be. I must have been imagining it. But his smile confirmed my suspicions and I was so pleased to finally see my old friend again as he leapt into my arms and hugged me tight. We hadn't seen each other since we were six. Hang on, did that mean?

"Mori?" The tall black haired man gave a smile that many would miss. Unlike Honey, he had changed a great deal. His height was defiantly different.

"Oh Eri-chan you've changed so much! You're so beautiful!" Honey exclaimed while dragging me over to the sofa I had previously vaulted over and sitting down next to me. Beautiful. It was a word I'd heard many times but never on it's own. Often it was followed by an insult of some sort. "Beautiful slut." "Beautiful liar." You name it, my brother's called me it.

"Thank you so much." I knew I was blushing at this point and I also knew that all the other boys were staring at the three of us. "You guys have changed a lot too. And have both got so handsome." I grinned only to have it vanish as the door was slammed open.

"Eri! I'm sick of you running away all the time. Come on we're going home." He took my hand and dragged me from the room but not before saying. "Her day to do what she likes is Tuesday. So you can see her tomorrow but if she comes in here any other day you are to tell me."

As I was pulled from the room I saw the guy with glasses look up at me for the first time with a look of "I know everything". And if that look was true I would finally have someone who knew my secret.


	2. Secrets

Tuesday. A day I am allowed out of the sight of my brother and am free to do as I wish...within reason. Of course he keeps track of me using a trackein my phone but I would never try to escape. And where would I go? It is only us two in our world and the gates are kept locked tight and the key...well Hisoka kept that at all times.

My time alone is usually spent looking in shop windows or reading in libraries. But today I could have a conversation for the first time in so long. I could sit and talk with old friends and ask what I had missed. A smile spread across my face as I opened the doors to the third music room. The same seven as yesterday stood inside chatting and laughing. This was going to be great.

"Eri-chan!" Honey came rushing towards me, took my hand and pulled me towards a table covered in different types of cake. "You still like cake don't you? I got your favourite flavours and Kyou-chan even closed the club for the day."

"You need to introduce me to everyone." I said while picking up a chocolate cake.

"Oh of course,Princess. Let me introduce you to everyone" The tall blonde said leaping before me. "My name is Tamaki. That is Kyouya" He poined to glasses guy. "That is Haruhi." He pointed to the brunette girl. "And those troublesome dopplegangers over there are Hikaru and Kaoru." He motioned towards the twins with their back towards us.

"So Eri-chan, were did you disappear to? You just stopped coming round without warning." Honey was looking down and I could tell he'd been upset by my sudden diasappearance.

"Well, my parents were killed so we moved out of the mansion. The housekeeper and maids raised me and my brother in a small mansion. We ended up looking after ourselves at fourteen. For a year after our parent's death I could visit you but after that it just became impossible for so many reasons." I explained after finishing my peice of cake and picking up another.

"So, do you have a boyfriend, Eri?" Kyouya said from his table.

"Awww, has Kyouya fallen in love with the new girl?" The twins said in unison.

"Mummy? Have you replaced me?" Tamaki siad before sitting in his corner.

"No I don't. Why?" I was a bit scared as to why he was asking. Sure he wasn't bad looking but he wasn't really my kind of guy. And Hisoka would kill me.

"It's not what you think. I was just wondering who got you pregnant." I stared at him in shock with wide eyes. And while I was looking at him everyone else was staring at me.

"I...I'm not...How did you..?" I couldn't get a complete sentence out. I was more scared than before. They knew half of my secret.

"My family runs the majority of hospitals around here. I searched for your documents and found you'd had an appointment resently about your pregnancy. You see I don't want this club shamed by a teenage mother." And with that he got up and left. knew this baby would be trouble but I never thought it would bring shame on my friends. I'd always hoped they'd help me through it.

"It's ok, Eri-chan. Kyou-chan just has a funny way of showing he's concerned. It'll be okay." Honey said holding my hand. And at that I prayed. I prayed that what he said would come true.


	3. Truth

The cakes were finally polished off with five minutes until the end of the club. I must admit eating that many cakes wasn't a good idea and apparently my pregnant body thought the same. My stomach was aching and I knew I'd be sick soon, so when the urge finally came I sprinted to the bathroom with one hands clutched to my mouth and the other to my stomach.

When I finished retching over the toilet I left the cubicle and slashed water from the sink over my face. Haruhi was sitting on the sink next to me reading a book. In the mirror I saw my own pale reflection. Dark rings spread under my eyes and I looked almost sickly.

"You alright?" She asked while putting the book back in her bag and jumping down from the sink.

"I think so. Cake just doesn't agree with me lately. Thank anyway." I replied with a smile. I liked this girl, she seemed trustworthy and level headed.

"You can talk to me if you want. And if you say it's a secret then I won't tell a soul."

"You want to know who the father is don't you?"

"Well, I'm concerned. After all, you seem afraid of your brother and have little contact with the outside world."

"If I tell you then you can't tell anyone. No matter how much you'll want to." While saying this struggled onto the sink surface and stared at the floor. Haruhi stood in front o me and took my hands to show me I should trust her.

"The father...He's...It's Hisoka." I felt the weight on my shoulders be lifted slightly and a couple of tears escaped my eyes.

"Let me guess, you didn't want any of this." Haruhi surprised me. If I'd told any one else about this then they'd be shocked and appalled at the sinful act between me and my twin but she saw past that. Maybe it was from dealing with Hikaru and Kaoru all day.

"Who would? I doubt any girl chooses to get pregnant with her brother's child."

"Does he know?" I looked up and she must have seen the fear in my eyes as she took some tissue and wiped my tears away. She knew without me saying. He could never know. If he knew... I dreaded to think of the consequences.

***

"Alright, Eri, time to go home." Hisoka said as he stood at the door waiting. Haruhi gave me a sympathetic look as I said my goodbyes and made my way out of the school and into my brother's small mini.

***

The car ride had been silent and full of tension. It's like he knew I was hiding something or had given someone a tiny glimpse of what went on between us.

I was sat on my bed reading "The Book Thief" when Hisoka came in and lent on my wall staring at me.

"I hope you only spoke to those guys. If I find you've been messing around with any of them then there'll be trouble." He said while sauntering over to my side.

"Why would it matter to you?" I muttered with no intention of him hearing. Unfortunately he did, grabbed my had and held me against the wall. His arm was across my throat and his other hand was holding my wrists above my head.

"It matters because I only want what's best for you and you are MINE! So don't you ever think otherwise." He emphasized the "mine" with a swift slap on my right cheek sending me crashing to the floor. After a few seconds of just looked down at me, he crouched at my side and caressed my stinging cheek. "I wish you wouldn't make me hurt you."

And with that he left me and locked my door. Clutching my knees to my chest and sobbing, I knew I had to find a way out. Maybe now that I had my old and new friends I would.


	4. Kiss

A strong arm enclosed me against a warm, muscular body. Smooth lips moved in sync with my own. The sensations running through me were so smooth and gentle, I felt calm and limp at the touch. Fingers ran through short silk hair and clutched to soft fabric as I became lost in the moment. Apparently he did too as the arm that was previously round my waist moved to let the hand run up and down my back, ocassionaly catching the back of my bra. We pulled away for air and I looked into his deep grey eyes and uncharacteristicly rosy cheeks. Before I had the chance to capture his lips again he leant down and placed soft butterfly kisses along my neck

Suddenly the kisses became too rough and impatient. This wasn't the same person I was kissing seconds ago. Slowly I was pulled from my dreams into the harsh reality of my life as I lay on my messed up bed and Hisoka was spread next to me, attacking my neck. Lifting his head, he noticed I'd woken up and quickly caught my reluctant lips. As I struggled against him it only made his fight more exciting. There was no where to run let alone a way to escape his iron grasp.

***

I woke to find my twin asleep naked next to me. Getting up, I went down to the kitchen and made myself a coffee and some toast. He always forgot to lock the door when we got those urges. One day that'll be the way I escape but not today. Today I need to earn his trust and think up a plan of action with Haruhi.

A fortune teller once told me to fear my reflection. I saw it as nonsense then as I laughed at it with Hisoka. Back when he was caring. Back when he loved me in the way a brother should. Now he only cares for the benefits of having a woman locked in a room. He only loves that I can be the barer of his child. And that's his aim. He claims that he needs an heir incase anything happens and if he ever married a girl then they wouldn't be good enough for his child. Only I can fill that space as he say that only us two can have a perfect beautiful child. Although many girls would swoon and submit at this, when it's your brother saying it, well, it's not right.

When I think about my life I see I mixture of emotions. I see sadness and relief at our parents death. Tears and smiles at the ones that raised me. Pain and love for the brother that uses me. No matter how much pain he will cause me, he's still my brother, my twin. It's a bond that can only be understood if you yourself have a twin. And I know that if I escape then I'll still write to him and check up on the internet to see if he's okay.

And many times pain and love go hand in hand. Those who suffer heart break yet can't get over the one that caused it feel it. So it's not that unreasonable is it? I admittedly don't love him the way he loves me but I care enough to not want to let him go or cause him harm. Though that is exactly what I should want. He's imprisoned me, abused me, raped me even. Yet I can't be the one that breaks him. The one that tells the world of his wrongs. Haruhi...I hope that she'll see through my smile and know my burdon. Dear Haruhi, please.

And as arms circle my waist and push me against the counter, I send my wish to her and my parents. May someone please help me soon.


	5. Lillies

Occaisonaly the softer side of my brother appears. The side that was in control until four years ago. The side that adored me and held me gently by the fire or took me out for the day. Today was one of those days. But not because he felt like it. It had been thirteen years since our parents died and we were going to visit their graves.

"Mother loved lillies." Hisoka said as he handed me the flowers so he could drive. The battered old red mini may have been on it's last legs but it was cherished by both me and my brother. It was Hisoka's first car and woud have been shared between us but he refused to let me takedriving lessons. Like many other things.

The perfume of the flowers was over powering and reminded me of our old home, of mother's dressing room.

***

"Mummy, what flowers are they?" I remember saying. Mum sat at the white dressing table fixing her hair in an intricate updo. Her smile was one of love and pride. As her fingers stopped working through her hair, she reached down and lifted my five year old self onto the dressing table.

"They're lillies. Smell them." Her voice was one like chimes and bells. As she lifted a white lillie she held it up to me and the strong smell made me smile and cough. And with that she put me down, kissed my forehead and told me to run along. She and father were going out for the evening and would be back later.

***

Little did we know that they'd never return. I remember how Hisoka and I had reacted in different ways when they told us the news. He ran to our room and locked the door. I ran to mother's dressing room and sat at the dressing table staring at the lillies. From that day on, I always had lillies in my room. Always white. Always in that vase.

Until the night it happened. It was a week after the housekeeper left and we were all alone. I'd noticed Hisoka changing slowly but that night...There was something alien about him. As the thunder crashed outside I saw him standing at my door. I thought...I thought he was here to see me through the night and protect me from the weather.

As the room flashed with light he roughly pushed me down on the bed. He took my shocked gasp as an invitation to let his tongue explore my mouth. Before I knew it his hands were exploring my body and undressing me.

The first night of many. The night I lost my virginity. It was't how I'd pictured it. You know, being with the man I loved and he loved me back, on our honeymoon and everything being extremely romantic verging on cheesy.

A car door slamming woke me from my thoughts. Hisoka opened my door before looping my arm through his own. Every year it went like this. We requested to be on our own for the whole day each year, wore black and stayed as silent as possible. I lay the flowers before crouching and cleaning the grave stones. Routine. It went this way every year.

After an hour of paying our respects and offering prayers we got up and silently drove back home.

Mother, guide me through this. Let there be an escape for me from this torture and let there be a way out of tis prenancy before it's too late


	6. Stupid

Tuesday came round at an aganizingly slow pace. The days were beginning to merge into one and the only clue I had that today was my favourite was the white coat left at the end of my bed. It was my brothers way of saying I was allowed out and he wasn't home either.

My walk to Ouran was long and tiresome. I'd done the best I could hair and make up wise and was wearing a long baby blue top with grey skinnie jeans. Hopefully I would fit in just enough to not get stared at. Standing out a little isn't exactly a bad thing though. I smiled at the sky. The world outside my home was so beautiful and clear. A crisp blue coloured the sky as the sun shown through the cold wind. Strangers buzzed around me and I loved the excerts from their conversations and imagining what came before and after the statement.

After looking into a few shop windows and taking a long walk through a magnificent park I found my way to the glorious gates that kept 'commoners' out of Ouran academy grounds. I would have been walking through these gates five days a week if my parents were still alive. They'd filled the forms for us to start at five years old and sorted everything. They'd even bought uniforms for the first stage of the academy. And right now I would have been in my third and final year of high school.

My world had been turned upside by those attackers. I didn't know whether to hate them or be grateful. On one hand, they'd stolen everything but my twin away from me and left me defenceless against him. On the other, I had experienced so many things and could feel so much sympathy for those I otherwise would have ignored.

A bell rang from inside the building and the courtyard in front of the school soon filled with blue and yellow. Fighting against the crowd, I pushed my way towards the entrance and fell into an empty corridor, much to my delight. I brushed off my knees while I stepped on shaky feet towards the Host Club. My whole body was trembling. Probably from not seeing Hisoka all day and fearing he could pop up at any moment. A stupid fear for a stupid girl.

"Eri-chan! You made it!" Honey came bounding towards me before spinning me round. Haruhi gave a small smile as she watched. Mori soon walked over and ruffled my hair. An hour of making it perfect went out the window and to be honest I didn't care. Being surrounded by people who truly cared about me mattered so much more.

"So how's your week been?" Kaoru said while leaning against the back of the sofa I had been sat on.

"The usual. Nothing out of the ordinary happened happened." I couldn't be called a liar for that. My week had been like every other week. Abuse, rape, one outing and lots of compliments/insults.

"I saw you at the cemetary a few days ago. Visiting anyone special?" Haruhi sat to my left, her eyes filled with concern.

"Oh it was the thirteenth anniversary of my parents' death so we visited their graves. We do it every year, don't worry. It's more a sign of respect than mourning now."

"Can I talk to you alone?" Haruhi proposed while standing and taking my hand.

***

"Have you thought any more about the baby?" Haruhi stood where she had a week ago. I knew the subject of our private conversation before it even escaped her lips.

"Not really. I'm not sure what the best thing to do is." I looked at my reflection. The girl in the mirrors reflection's hair was wild and untamed and she looked like my mother when she'd had a hard, long day.

"Maybe you should get rid of it. You don't know what complications there'll be since you are brother and sister and who knows what will happen when he finds out and it isn't what he expects" She had a good point. He'd talked for years about our perfect child but what happens if it's deformed or has a disability? What then? He'd blaim me and then I'd suffer even more.

"I think you're right. Okay, tell the guys I went home. I'm going to talk to the doctor about having an abortion. See you soon." Those words were hard to say. Despite the acts that brought this child into the world it was still mine and I loved it. I just loved it too much to let it live a life of sin and fear.


	7. Chicken

Here I sit in an empty waiting room. The doctor had referred me to an abortion clinic that had a free appointment.

I'm sorry, little one. If the circumstances were different then my opinion about all of this would be very different but I can't put both of us at risk. I'll bear your pain for you.

"Miss Ogawa?" Looking up, I saw a thin woman with ivory skin and brunette hair that had been tightly scraped back into a neat bun. Her features looked tired and full of sorrow. I guess working in a place like this can take it's toll. I bet she was once full of energy and joy. "Please follow me."

The walk down the narrow corridor was long and boring. Neither of us wanted-or even knew how- to break the awkward silence. There was no conversation to start and a joke would be viewed as disrespectful.

***

After a series of check-ups, scans, background checks and lectures, I left the building with 4 pills in a small bottle. I'd had to take one in there and there was no turning back now. Within the next few days I would have a miscarriage and it will all be over. The chicken's way out but I felt unusually brave doing it. This chicken was too afraid of the fox to trust it with it's eggs.

It was just turning six when I looked up at the clock tower in the town centre. Hisoka didn't mind me being out as long as I got back for midnight so I started walking to Haruhi's house using the address and directions she had given me.

Three swift knocks to Haruhi's door and seconds later she had opened it. What I didn't expect was the whole host club sitting inside. Just what I needed when I felt on the verge of tears.

"Eri-chan! What a surprise. Why are you here?" Honey was the first to pipe up.

"I...I just..." My voice trembled no matter how hard I tried to steady it. My eyes filled with unvoluntary tears. Why was this so hard? I chose my child's destiny. On my way here I'd passed so many happy couples pushing prams and holding toddler's hands. Why did I care so much?

"Guys can you leave? We need to talk just us girls." The guys left reluctantly. And when the last one went through the door I broke down, my knees buckling and hitting the floor. "I guess you went through with it then."

"Haruhi, I feel so miserable. People passed me buy with children and I envied them. I kept thinking how much God must hate me to put me through all the sorrow I've suffered." Words ran out of my mouth in flooded to match my tears. I knew I must look a mess but I couldn't hold all these emotions in any more. I'd been bottling them up since my parent's death to keep my twin strong because I felt I owed him something but now...now I owe him nothing. He owes me everything. My messed life, my stolen virginity, my broken heart, my shattered soul. Everything that had gone wrong was his fault.

And I hated him for it.


	8. Silence

Silence. A beautiful thing that on occasions I get to experience. When I'm not at the Host Club, walking around town or having my brother talking/shouting at me, I have moments in my room when I can curl up on my rocking chair and read a book or just get lost in thought. I loved it.

Tonight was one of those nights. I was sat curled up in my duvet for warmth while balancing a book. I'd bought it months ago and only got round to starting it. And to be honest it was interesting and got my mind off all my problems.

Hisoka suspects that I'm secretly having a relationship with Haruhi. He doesn't see past her male clothing and short hair. At around eleven he traced me there and when Haruhi opened the door he went mad. "How dare I be at another man's house?" He said. As if he owned me. I cried as he dragged me to the car. I cried silently all the way home. I'd only just stopped crying when I opened this book. Everything was happening so fast and my head was still spinning from the hell that had been my day out. Maybe it was safer to stay at home.

It's a bit much when your own home and the rest of the world all seem dangerous and scary. In fact I can only think of two places where I feel safe: at Haruhi's and at the third music room. One day when I'm free from all of this maybe she'll take me in. Or Kyouya will let me camp out in the club room. Uh what am I thinking? Haruhi doesn't have the space for me and I can't camp out at a school. It's not practical at all and I wouldn't enjoy myself.

So I came to the conclusion that if I ever left this place I'd have to have enough money to buy or rent a place of my own. And then I'd meet my prince Charming and we'll fall in love and live happily ever after. If you believe in that crap.

I believe that if I do get a place alone I will do one of three things:  
-have many meaningless relationships  
-never want to have a relationship and avoid love at all costs  
-Or find a guy that'll listen to me and help me

If I'm honest I really don't know which one will happen or which I'd prefer. Sure an understanding guy would be nice but for me they are rare and hard to come by. Not to mention I'd probably screw it up. And what guy wants to hear their girlfriend saying "Oh by the way, my twin brother raped me numerous times and I aborted his child at the age of eighteen." Yeah, that reeeally beats "Welcome home Love".

There's laughing outside my door. Hisoka has a few friends that like to come over at all hours. In their eyes I'm not his twin but his girlfriend and it's not unusual for them to join in when he commits his assault. But of cause they are forced to wear protection. Because God forbid I get pregnant with another man. Hisoka would kill me with his own hands.

I look up from my book to see the hallway light shining in and the shadows of three men on my wall. A new guy is with them. Great, another night spent in pain.


	9. Mobile

Twenty Four Hours. Take the pills. Within six to eight hours. No baby.

In another five to seven hours I'll have had a miscarriage. That's a scary thought. I took the pills 20 minutes ago and didn't feel much different as I fried eggs and bacon for Hisoka. He had a job interview today so I thought I'd make the effort to get him in a good mood. Maybe he'd let me out - though I doubted it.

"Morning." He mumbled as he sat reading the paper at the small dining table. Just as I turned to set his plate on the table a pain spread across my stomach that made me double over in pain. His breakfast landed on the floor and the plate broke with an almighty crash. My hands clutched my top as I fell to my knees and bent over until my head touched the cold tile. They said there might be cramping but this was a bit much.

In alarm Hisoka leapt up and started demanding to know what was wrong. All I could do was groan and that only made him more angry as he tried to pull me up. It took me awhile to stand facing him and when I did the wave of sickness hit me and I raced to the bathroom. I'd be the one cleaning any mess I made and I didn't want to have to scrub up vomit.

***

After much debate about staying, I convinced Hisoka to go. Under the agreement of course that I'd stay in bed as much as possible(exactly where he liked me). And I was doing exactly that. When I'm sick I tend to sleep me than usual and right now I was in and out of conciousness. Everytime I woke up there was a different program on the television and in the end I just turned it off.

It had turned five by now and Hisoka wouldn't be back until seven so I decided to ring Haruhi's mobile. It took the second time calling and four rings for her to pick up.

"Hello?" She sounded flustered and rushed and by the noises in the background- squeels, shouts and laughing- I quessed she was still at the Host Club.

"Hi, it's Eri. I just called to say I think the pills worked." I replied not wanting to take up her time and wondering why I rang her in the first place.

"That's good! I'm guessing your brother's not home since you're calling."

"Yeah, he's trying to find a job or something. I can't wait till next Tuesday so i can see you all."

"I can't wait either. The twins, Honey-senpai and Tamaki-senpai won't shut up about you. They're excited about having another girl here and hoping it'll bring out my feminine side."

"Haha, tell them they shouldn't want to change you, they should think you're perfect as you are. Anyway I should go."

"Alright, see you soon. Call me if you need anything." And with that she hung up. So I'm the talk of the club am I? Four rich guys constantly talking about me. Hmm.. Didn't seem that bad to be fair. Maybe I could play that to my advantage when I escape.

Escape.

That's all I think about nowadays. It plagues my mind and has me plotting and planning. I'm pretty sure these thoughts will lead me to attempt it one day.


	10. Hooker

I thought this day was going to drag on eternally. I woke with a feeling of dread and sorrow. My child was gone and I was trapped in a house with so many bad memories. The feeling soon left shortly after my twin left for a bath though.

With a kiss on the cheek he left me sitting on the sofa to go for his bath. He always takes a while so I knew I had to find something to occupy myself with and found myself wondering into the kitchen. And there they were. His keys. Thoughts of freedom drowned my mind and the temptation felt overwhelming and hard to bare. With a swift motion the keys were in my hand and I knew I couldn't let this moment pass me by.

After quickly glancing at the bathroom door I quietly sprinted into my room, shoved my books and some clothes into a rucksack and laced up my converse. Getting another bag, I filled it with my precious belongings, such as my father's handkerchief, but stopped when I came to an old photograph of my family. Father stood tall and proud with one arm round mother's waist and another resting on Hisoka's head. Mother looked beautiful and had a hand resting on my shoulder. It was the day we'd moved into the mansion. I was three at the time and don't remember much but I remember this photo being taken.

Setting it on the side, I left it with a note saying simply "I'm sorry.". And with that I unlocked the front door as quietly as possible before running out and getting into the mini. I may not have had lessons but I'd watched closely enough to know what to do. Plus, this would give me a headstart and make it less likely that he'll catch up.

***

Stopping outside a hotel, I swiftly shut and locked the car door before leaving the car park. People stared at my flustered face and I didn't blame them. I'd had no time to sort my hair or makeup and was currently in the black mini skirt that barely covered my ass and top that was three sizes too small that Hisoka had dressed me in. And the fact that I was exiting a hotel car park probably made me look like a hooker. Not that I really cared as I made my way into the hotel.

I handed the money over as I signed my name in the register. Eri Ogawa and Takashi Morinozuka. That should keep Hisoka occupied for a while I thought as I left the hotel again. And if he aproached Mori then Mori has the strength to defend himself. Now, to Ouran.

***

Numerous stares of shock were sent in my direction as I stood in the club room doorway. The club had guests that had all fallen silent and turned to face me as soon as the door had opened. The boys' mouths hung open and their eyes grew wide, well apart from Mori and Kyouya. My sense of deviousness came through strongly as a smurk spread across my hidden face. This was my revenge on the stuck up cows that looked down on a girl that under different circumstances would have been their friend.

Flicking my dark hair away from my face, I began to strut over to the twins. They were the easiest target and I knew they'd get the wind up and join in. All eyes were on me as I leant over the back of the seat next to Kaoru making sure my boobs were on full display to the girls opposite.

"So how long do you want? I'm not cheap." I made sure I was loud enough for everyone to hear. A light blush spread across his face and in the corner of my eye I could see Hikaru smirk and I knew he was catching on.

"We don't mind. You're the best money can buy. Come and sit down." Hikaru said and that's when I saw something snap in Kaoru's eye and he gave a smug grin to his twin. I trotted round the sofa and was about to sit next to Hikaru when he grabbed my waist and sat me on his lap. To create even more of an effect I spread my legs over Kaoru's lap. I swear the girls hadn't breathed in all the time I'd been here. I turned to see many had hit the floor and others were turning blue. A quick peck on the cheek for Hikaru sent the rest fainting.

"Ahh that was fun." I said getting up and smoothing down my skirt. "I escaped guys. So which of you guys are letting me stay at yours till I get back on my feet?"

There was no response and I saw that each boy was still too shell shocked to reply.


	11. Shattered

Before the boys could answer an almighty crash sounded from behind me and I knew. He'd found me.

"How fucking dare you!" He ran in and roughly took hold of my hair. I cried in pain as he thrashed my head backwards and forwards. I'd never seen him like this and I knew he was no longer my twin. This man in front of me is a monster that had stayed underneath my brothers skin all these years.

"What kind of a twin are you! You're supposed to love me and do as I say. Always be there and respect me. And above all twins don't keep secrets from each other!" He bellowed. His grip on my hair tightened and tears formed in my eyes as he shook me harder. All the host boys were too shocked to do anything. Either that or they wanted to see how this would turn out.

"Why can't you be like Kaoru! He's a good little uke that listens and does as his brother says. And I bet he wouldn't abort his own twin's child!" He was crying now. Gasps sounded around me as the club found out about the all too real twincest. Hisoka released my hair and fell to the floor sobbing.

"You used to love me. You used to never leave my side. What changed?" His demanding eyes looked up at me and I couldn't help from crying and falling to my knees in front of him. His pain was my pain. The curse of twins. I felt his heartbreak. He'd lost his dream, his child, his love. He finally knew my feelings and I knew how much he was hurting. Tears streamed down both of our faces as we stared at each other.

"You did." Those simple words made Hisoka bend over and put his head in his hands.

"Why did you stay for so long? I've hurt you so much. The sins I've commited are unforgiveable. Forget me. Think of yourself as an only child. I can no longer be seen as your brother for both our sakes." And with that he stood and worked out the door still sobbing.

"Eri-chan, are you okay?" six of the hosts gathered near me but to be honest I didn't care. My twin had cut all ties between us and the pain...My soul and heart was shattered and I was finding it hard to breathe. Breaking away was so much harder than I thought. Verging on impossible. The bond between us was too strong, I felt near death when he walked away. I couldn't bare to be away from him.

Standing, I began to run only to be held back by numerous hands. Slapping violently, I managed to break free and run through the corridors. As I burst through the main entrance I could see him half running half walking out of the gates. I tried to catch up but...

***

A screach of breaks.

A scream of a girl.

A terrible bang.

A frantic rush of footsteps.

***

No. No. This can't be happening. I watched as my brother's body was hit by a limo and fell to the floor like a discarded rag doll. I cried out as I ran clumsily towards the road. Strangers had gathered round him and I heard the footsteps of the hosts behind me. Pushing my way through the crowd I knelt next to my broken twin. The pain that had occupied my body before now doubled and I knew I couldn't let him go.

As the paramedics worked on his body I felt hands hold my shoulders and arms. I looked behind me to see Honey, Mori, Haruhi and Kaoru looking at me with great sympathy. Behind them stood and serious Kyouya, a miserable looking Tamaki and Hikaru deep in thought. This must be difficult for him to watch since he and Kaoru are so close. But right now my priority was my own brother


	12. Stable

I've always hated hospitals. They always meant upset and tragedy. Not just for when my parents died but for all the times my brother has been hurt. You see as a child he never listened to warnings of the maids and our parents. In fact quite the opposite. They'd tell us not to climb the tree so I'd stay on the ground and watch as Hisoka climbed it fearlessly. And he'd always end up hurt but never learnt his lesson.

And that's why anxious was an understatement for how I felt as I sat in the waiting room with the seven hosts. They'd all realized a while ago that leaving me alone was the best option. When they'd arrived they tried to talk and comfort me but I wouldn't reply. I came up with the theory long ago that if I stayed silent until we heard news then he'd be okay. It had worked until now so I decided I'd keep the childish tradition. Of course it didn't keep the doubts or images from my mind.

This was his worst injury yet. All the times that he fell from things and got hurt doing things he shouldn't had all been from scrapes to broken bones but he'd always laughed through it. He'd never actually got broken until now and I couldn't help feeling responsible. It was my own stupid actions. If only I hadn't run away. Or if I'd made him stay a bit longer. Then none of this...

"Miss Ogawa?" A voice broke through my thoughts, stopping my inner torture. Looking up, I saw a nurse with thin greying hair and hazel eyes.

"Your brother is still unconcious but he's stable. We'll be keeping him in for a while to monitor him and we'll notify you when he wakes up." And with that she left once again.

Stable.

It didn't mean I wouldn't lose him but it made the chances of his survival so much greater.

"Guys we should go, it's getting late." Haruhi stood up from my side and began walking to the door followed by all but one of the others. They didn't question him or tell him to follow. I wondered who it was as I could only see his feet with my head bowed. I wonder how late it was. It felt like hours, days, years even since I'd entered this room. After a few long minutes the boy got up and walked over to the seat next to me. A comforting arm circled my shoulders and as I began to shake with the beginning of my crying he pulled me close and rubbing my back.

The smell of vanilla struck me and I instantly felt comforted though my tears didn't stop. When was the last time I'd cried this much? The tears showed no signs of stopping and they began to stain his blazer.

"Oh I'm so sorry." I pulled away, pulled out my hanky and began to wipe them off. He chuckled and I finally looked at his face. A sympathetic smile and caring eyes looked down at me as a hand was brought up to my cheek and wiped away my tears.

"Brothers are such a worry aren't they?" A lopsided grin overtook the symathy and I couldn't help smiling back.

"Miss Ogawa, your brother is awake. Do you wish to see him?" I stood and walked towards the door.

***

Hisoka had asked me to wait outside the door while he spoke to the remaining host. Little did he know that I could hear everything going on through the slightly open door.

"What do you want?" The host said coldly. It stung to know the boy that had been comforting me was now being so cruel to my twin.

"I'm going to tell the police everything I've done. Obviously I can't seperate Eri from myself and trying to die didn't work so I'm handing myself in. I need to be punished for the pain I've caused my own flesh and blood. Take care of her. Give her the wonderful life she deserves...please...Kaoru." Tears threatened to fall as I heard my brother's words. He ran out in the road on purpose...And now he was sending himself to prison. I trembled and found it hard to stay standing there. instinct drew me into the room and to his bed. I held him close knowing that this may be the last time.

***

I sat tensely in the waiting room while the police interogated my brother in his room. I really did hate hospitals. He was still only stable and I didn't know what to hope for. If he took a turn for the worst I'd lose him forever but if he got better the world would know of his sins and he'd be hated by everyone.

Kaoru gave a reassuring squeeze to my hand when the police came in to question me.

***

It was all over. The police knew. And a nurse had just come in and confirmed my fears. Hisoka had taken a bad turn and it was doubtful that he'd make it through the night. I sat deadly still on my chair leaning towards the bed, one hand holding my twins and the other being held by Kaoru.

"Kaoru...promise me you'll do as I asked." Hisoka was struggling to breathe. "Eri is the only meaningful thing I have left." He gasped for air at the end of most of the words. It was painful to see him in this state.

"Eri, I'm eternally sorry for all I've done to you. Hell seems a fitting punishment for the sinful deeds I've inflicted on you. I love you so much and I'm only sad to not be here to see you be happy and get married and raise a family. Remember after mum and dad died when we said I'd give you away at your wedding? I wish I could and I'm sorry for breaking so many promises. Buy back our mansion. Rehire the maids and housekeeper. Raise a family there and be like mum. You're already so much like her and I know you'll be a great mum. You have so much love to give and I've stopped you from finding someone to give it to. Please forgive me, but I understand if you don't." His eyes slid shut and his breathing slowed before stopping. The heart monitor screeched. I got up, slipped my hand out of Kaoru's and bent over to kiss my brothers forehead.

"All is forgiven." I whispered on his skin. Walking out felt painful and depressing but I couldn't stay any longer. Like my brother said, I had so much love to give and the more time I spent in there the longer it would take me to move on. Kaoru took my hand silently as we walked towards the entrance. He walked with me the whole way home.


	13. Run

As old servants carried a coffin down to the church a small group in black slowly followed.

In the centre of the group was a young women. Her face was kept hiden from the sun by a black veil. She wore a black velvet dress that reached her knees and small slip on shoes. In her hands she held a white lily and kept her head bowed. The boy to her left had his hand on her shoulder in a show of support that he knew wouldn't do much. He wore a simple suit just like the other five boys there. On the girl's right was her best friend, the one that had helped her through the hardest of times. She wore a black shirt and black jeans. Behind the three walked their five closest friends.

The boy's twin held his free hand as he walked behind him. They knew that one day the other may suffer this pain. Beside him stood a emotionless faced boy who constantly kept looking down at the small blonde that clung to his arm. His usually joyful face had been replaced with one of sorrow. To his right was an unusually serious blonde who kept his mouth shut to stop from saying anything that may make things worse. A boy with glasses kept a watchful eye over the others, taking in every detail.

They followed the coffin, the coffin that held a body too young to have died but too sinful to have lived.

****

I sat silently as they set my brother at the front of the church, my veil hiding the tears escaping my eyes. I'd worked so hard on my makeup this morning and I knew it was now running down my face. Not that I really cared. No one would care how I looked. Today was about saying goodbye to my brother and trying to let go. Though I don't know how one can let go of the person she's spent her entire life with. The only one she had left in this cold world.

I felt someone squeeze my left hand while someone else took my right. A strong hand gave my shoulder a squeeze and another gently rested their hand on it. And I remembered. I'm not alone. I had these amazing friends that although I've only known most of them for a few weeks, I know they'd always be there. My twin would be happy that I was surrounded by people that loved me.

***

The service had ended and my tears had almost subsided. Getting up, I walked towards the coffin. Laying the lily on it I looked down at my brother. His skin was pale, too pale. His lips were blue and his hair had been styled differently. With tender hands I brushed his fringe back into place with my fingers and undid his tie a little. He never liked it done up all the way, he'd claim he was choking and go all dramatic.

A single tear ran down my cheek as I put the lily inside, wrapped father's handkerchief around it and held it in place with my "sister" ring. Something of everyone's. I gave his lips a peck and gave a small smile as I silently said goodbye and promised him everything he'd wanted me to do.

Turning swiftly on my heels I began to run down the aisle. I tore off my veil and could now see the hosts' shocked faces more clearly. I held my skirt up slightly to make the running easier.

This was something we'd planned years ago. Hisoka probably forgot but we said that when one of us died the other would run out of the church and not tell anyone of their plans. We used to believe that anyone who followed were truly there for us. We agreed that we'd run to our home and the others spirit would wait for the other there and we'd meet our parents once again. It sounds stupid now but for me the idea had a whole new meaning. Though I still wanted to see who runs with me, I used the idea as a symbol of my new freedom. The freedom me and my twin both had from the small world we used to live in. The world that suffocated and almost destroyed us. Freedom.

As I ran through the park near my old home I heard lots of footsteps behind me. I looked back to see all the hosts, most looking confused but some smiling and laughing. A cool wind rushed over me as I slowed then stopped. Rusty, locked gates stood in front of me. I pulled out the set of keys the estate agent had given to me and opened them. Taking a step inside I felt 4 years old again. The wind whistled around me and I felt my family's presence. For a second I thought I saw mother knitting on the swinging chair, then father doing some paper work by the fountain like he did on hot summer afternoons. Then For an instant I saw Hisoka and myself, running across the neat grass giggling and shrieking.

A nostalgic smile appeared on my face as the others caught up with me and looked around.

"It hasn't changed much." Honey said delicately. He was right. Surely after all these years the owners would have changed the layout, or added something, or changed something! But everything was exactly the same. And in perfect condition, as if someone had cleaned and sorted everything out just yesterday. Then maybe...

I walked down the long driveway towards the grand front door. If nothing out here had changed...

I unlocked it quickly and opened the door to find my home...Exactly the way I remember it. Nothing had been moved, although dust sheets had obviously been put over everything. Mother's book lay on her chair exactly on the page she left it, father's winter jacket was still hung on the hook by the door and over by the fireplace two small sets of clothes lay on the rug.

I remembered. The day my parents were killed me and Hisoka had been playing outside. It had snowed and we got soaked and almost got ill. The maids hurried to change us out of the clothes, fearing what our parents would think.

Our parents...I gasped and ran up the staircase. I slowly opened the door and the perfume of lillies hit me. Mother's dressing room hadn't changed. The white dressing table stood proudly where it always had. Only one thing had been changed since mother told me to "run along", the right top draw had been pulled out and tilted lazily downwards. Curiosity took hold of me and I walked towards it.

Inside were two things, a picture of me and Hisoka and a letter. The envelope bore my name and I delicately opened it.

***

_Dear Eri,_

I feel silly writing this, I saw you not ten minutes ago. But something keeps nagging in the back of my mind that tells me this has to be done now. I have a bad feeling about tonight, so I'm writing this in case I don't come back.

Eri, my angel, look after yourself. I know your brother is a handful sometimes but you're the stronger twin and I know you'll find a way of coping with him when I'm not here. I know you'll grow up into a beautiful young woman, and it saddens me to think I won't be there to see it. That's why I really hope this premonition is wrong.

I pray to God that you find a man that loves you. I suppose that's one good thing about my feeling, I won't be there to see you get hurt and suffer along side you. I'm not much use when it comes to advise so maybe you're better off without.

There is a necklace in my jewelery box, a sapphire teardrop shaped pendant, that I want you to wear to your wedding. I wore it when I married your father and I hope that if you have a daughter she will wear it too.

Good luck with everything my love. You are strong like your father so I know you'll be fine.

Eternal love,  
Mother  
xxxxxx 


	14. Snow

How long had a stood here? Mesmorised. It had been so long since I'd seen snow let alone stood in it. So pure and beautiful.

I think the hosts left a while ago though they didn't say goodbye. They'd left me to my silent home, with no one but the maids that had just arrived for company. I was the lady of the house now, in change of everything.

The back garden had always been my favourite place. A fountain stood in the middle of the mini maze. The water had frozen over and looked incredible. Wind beat against my face making it numb and my fingers hurt. Winter. It was an amzing time.

"This really is a magnificent estate." I jumped at the sudden noise. A soft cheerful voice met my ears and warmed my heart. The boy took my hand and I leant on his shoulder. "I think you should go inside before you get sick." And before I could protest I was being led inside.

***

"Thank you, Kaoru." My voice was uncharacteristicly soft and gentle as I sat on the high stool in the kitchen. I'd given the maids the night off in thanks for the work they'd done to ready the house for today. Kaoru was currently standing at the counter in front of me trying to work out the recipe book. Set out in front of him was a bag of flour, a bag of sugar and a couple of other things we found.

He gave a mischievious grin before flicking flour at me. I had a shocked expression that soon returned the grin as I slowly picked up the bag of flour. Kaoru let out a silent "oh shit" before sprinting to the other side of the room. Catching up with him, I lifted the bag to pour it over his head however he got hold of it and a battle soon began. We struggled and laughed as we fought over the bag that was still elovated above us. With one finally tug the bag split and covered both of us. I shrieked and he only laughed harder.

"You're evil." I muttered in a fake annoyed tone. He didn't seem to buy it.

"But ten percent less evil than Hikaru." He replied playfully as he ruffled my hair, making flour cloud around me. As I glared at him he stepped forward and slipped his arms around my waist. For a moment I tensed before relaxing again and returning the hug and holding him tight.

After a few moments he pulled away slightly and brought his face closer to mine. Our breathes mixed as he closed the gap and connected our lips. Everything felt so perfect and I knew this would be forever.

I'd finally found my love and he loved me back.

Hisoka, though I miss you I know you're happy that I have Kaoru. Goodnight and God bless dear brother

So this was my story, I hope you enjoyed it, the ending was mixed. Happy or tragic? Only you can decide.


	15. Years

...4 years...

Mother, Father, Hisoka. How times have changed since you parted from this life. Kaoru and I married last week. The service was truelly beautiful and all I could have hoped for. My dress was an empire line in white with small orange floral patterns along the edges and I wore my mother's necklace as promised. Haruhi was my maid of honor in a simple orange dress. Kaoru looked so handsome in his suit and his brother stood next to him with a proud look on his face. Honey and Mori both gave me away and looked happy doing so.

For our honeymoon we went to England, somewhere I had always wished to see and it was everything I expected. I loved every moment.

...5 years...

For all the hours I had been laying in labour I had seriously wondered why the hell I ever wanted a child. Why on earth I had been willing to go through this agony. I even started shouting at Kaoru and blaming everything on him. But the moment they put my baby girl in my arms I knew it was all worth it. My mothering instincts took over and I smiled and turned to my husband. He returned my proud smile as he lay on the bed next to me and put an arm over my shoulder.

That day we planted a tree near the fountain in the back garden.

...6 years...

It's our beautiful daughter's first birthday today. Ran has her father's red hair and my eyes but slightly darker. She took her first steps just a few days ago and I felt so proud. Being a mother truelly is wonderful. But today we took her to the graves of her uncle and grandparents. She giggled the whole way there and fell strangely silent when we stood at the stones as if she knew why we were here. She seems to have the amazing power to pick up on our emotions, I can tell she's going to be very bright.

...22 years...

Urgh forty. Forty felt like a strange age. Not old but not young. But I had my daughter to keep my entertained and feeling like an eighteen year old again.

She's seventeen now and for her birthday we decided to get her a motor bike, as she had finally passed her test the month before. Don't get me wrong, I was worried senseless at the thought of my baby girl on the thing but she had worked so hard learning to ride it and taking her test more than once that I thought she deserved it.

Although she is clever like I predicted she is a total tomboy and has strong opinions. She's vegetarian and occasionally attends protests. And when she needs time to think or do work she climbs the tree that was planting the day she was born and sits there for hours. Sometimes it's hard to get her to come inside. And if I had a young body like hers I'd climb it too and wouldn't come down for anything.

I blame her tomboyishness on her uncle. Although he doesn't visit everyday like we thought he would at first he does visit often and loves his neice dearly. Kaoru is a sensible and mature father to her but when his twin is around...Let's just say they become as mischeivious as they were before. Luckily I talked her out of playing tricks on people.

So, mother, father, Hisoka, now that you know my story I thought you'd like to hear hers. Though it is not as dramatic as my own it is more daring and adventurous. This is how she found love and heartbreak. And I will hand my journal over to her now. The pages are almost filled with my tale and now it is her time to express herself.

Maybe you'll find out things she won't even tell me.


	16. Tomboy

Otenba. Tomboy. That's what they call me. They see the tough, uncaring outer layer of my personality. The part that protects me from the harshness of the outsides opinions. From the media's speculations about the Hitachiin daughter. The glare of the world. My rough surface keeps my soul safe from their words.

What they choose not to see is my deep, thoughtful, sensitive heart and mind. My outside may be the effect of my father and uncle combined but my inside is my mother and slightly father. I have read the story already written in this book and see more than ever what makes my mother the way she is. The reason she looks at dad and uncle Hikaru with such amused and proud eyes that hold a hint of sadness.

So I should intorduce myself. My name is Ran and welcome to my life. I have red hair, light blue eyes and pale skin. Despite my father's attempt to make me more girly I wear boyish clothes and spend most of my time in a tree.

The tree was planted on the day of my birth and was extremely special to me. It had a perfect view of the house and fountain and I'd built a box that I attatched to the tree that held all my secret stuff. My sketch book and some stuff that I found around the house were in there.

I have one best friend called Ayano, she has shoulder length brunette hair and brown eyes to match. We only hang out with each other because we know everyone else is only interested in our money. She means a lot to me as we've been together since we were two. Did I mention she was uncle Tamaki and Aunty Haruhi's daughter?

So this is my story of how my life got unbelievably perfect then came crashing down, all in two months.

And it all began three months ago when I was sitting right here in this tree...

***

A yawn escaped my lips as I sketched the fountain for the fourth time. I couldn't seem to get it right and I'd lost track of time. One moment it had been a bright sunny afternoon and then it became dark and cool. I put my sketch book back in my hand made box before sitting with my legs swinging as I looked up to the moon. It was full and glowed bright as the stars twinkled close. Somewhere up there was my uncle Hisoka. Mother had told me about how wonderful he was and I wished one day to meet him.

Rustling woke me from my daydream and I span my head to look underneath the tree. A man stood below me not realising my presence. He looked exhausted and slumped down against the tree. After a few moments when I thought he was unconsious I slipped off my branch and landed almsot silently on my feet. Unfortunately it was still too loud as he quickly looked up with a shocked expression. Deep bags were under his eyes and he looked shifty but too tired to move. I felt sorry for him so I brought out a blanket and a small bowl of soup before laying on my branch and falling to sleep myself


	17. Meeting

A cool breeze woke me. Slowly opening my eyes I saw that I was on the bench under the Sakura Tree. Strange, I never come here. This is mother and father's place. Father proposed here and they return to the tree for quiet dances and romantic picnics. It was their place not mine.

Then I saw the blanket wrapped around my body and the note pinned to the bench. The caretaker wouldn't be too happy about that. But then again it's nothing compared to some of the damage I've caused to the house. With a light tug I pulled the oin out and the note with it.

***

_Dear kind stranger,_

Thank you so much for your hospitality and care. The soup was delicious and I was able to get an hours sleep, a lot more than usual. I hope you don't mind that I moved you. I didn't want to see you falling and hurting yourself.

I would like to meet you again so would you meet me at the same tree at ten tonight?

Yours faithfully,  
Akio.

P.S. Sorry that I used this paper from your sketch pad. I hope you don't mind. Your an amazing artist by the way.  


Akio. So that was his name. What did he mean about one hours sleep being more than usual? There was something about this boy that told me he was dangerous, trouble but I couldn't help myself. I guess that was my first mistake. I decided to meet him again. If I'd only chosen differently...

***

"I'm just going outside for a while, mum!" I called into the living room. She was sat in front of the fire with paperwork spread around her. She runs a charity and hostel for abused women and children. I didn't know then why it meant so much to her but after she gave me this book I understand everything. Her hair was scraped into a loose bun and she scrunched her face trying to work all the figures out.

I decided to leave her to it. Best to leave her alone when she's working or you get snapped at.

At was five minutes to ten when I reached my tree. There was no sign of him but I was early. Everything in me was telling me to turn back. To go and help mum with her work, anything but wait here for a total stranger.

"Hey." A smooth voice broke through my thoughts and I looked up to see him. His hair was a deep red, obviously dyed, and there were still dark circles under his luminous green eyes. He wore a simple black t-shirt and blue jeans, his hands in his pockets. "I'm glad you showed."

"My name's Ran by the way." I tried my best not to sound nervous. It's a good thing I can act.

"It's nice to meet you Ran." He smiled so nicely...The memory almost makes me not ashamed to say I fell for him.

***

And so we kept meeting like this for the next month. Within the first two weeks he'd asked me to be his girlfriend and I said yes. Mother and Father knew nothing and I didn't intend to tell them. He was nothing like us. And 2 weeks after that signalled a month since I first met him. And so begins the two months that changed me forever.


	18. Stars

As I lay beneath the stars I'd never felt more happy. I'd met Akio exactly a month ago today and he'd been extra romantic today.

**Flashback**

I made my way out to the patio to meet my wonderful boyfriend on our one month anniversary and was surprised by the path of candles that led from my tree down past the maze and out of site. A smile crept across my face as I walked down the glowing path that ended at a row of hedges The leaves in front of me looked unusually disturbed and untidy and a couple of broken branches lay on the floor. I took a hint from the clues and pushed my way through the hedge to a part of the garden I'd never seen.

The grass was long and the rose bushes unkept. This garden hadn't been touched in what looked like years. Then I saw him. Akio lay on a picnic blanket by a moss covered angel statue.

When I reached the blanket I saw the candles that were spread around it and the lily that lay in his hand.

**End**

No one would find us here and it was completly silent apart from Akio's heartbeat as I lay my head on his chest. The world was perfect and I felt like I'd known him my whole life.

" Ran? Have you ever thought about the future? Like getting married and raising a family and stuff?" Akio broke the silence and his question took me by surprise. I'd never really thought about it. I mean I knew it'd more than likely happen one day but I'd never thoguht about it in depth.

"Not really, but I hope I do get married one day. I'm not sure about kids just yet though." My reply was truthful and I honestly didn't know where he was going with this. "What about you?"

"I'd like to get married as soon as possible. Preferably to you. Sorry if I'm being a bit forward I just believe we should be truthful with each other." His answer shocked me more than his question had. Was he really telling the truth?

"Is that your way of proposing?" I joked as I rolled onto my stomach. What if he really meant it?

"Well, yeah it kind of is. I had this crazy idea that you'd agree and we'd run away from everything and find soemwhere far away, but I know it's too soon."

What on earth possessed me that night? Was it the candles? The secret garden? Or maybe it was the idea of an adventure. Whatever it was I said yes and at midnight snuck out of the house with a backpack full of my things and left on his motorbike. Around my neck was my grandmother's necklace that both she and mother wore at their weddings, tonight was mine and I wanted them there in some way or another.

I only left a note to my parents explaining why I'd gone and that I didn't know when I'd be in contact or returning. If I'd known then about all the things my mother had gone through I would have thought differently.


	19. Habit

I'd had this habit for seventeen years now. Getting up at one am, silently leaving my own bedroom and slipping into my daughter's. Her sleeping form calmed me and made me so glad of all the decisions I'd made. I sometimes doubted that I'd done the right thing and wondered what might have been. If my twin had lived. If I hadn't arborted my first child. If my parents were still here. Looking at the beautiful young woman that my husband and I had created made all the suffering and sorrow worthwhile.

Tonight was no different than all the others. The alarm under my pillow only loud enough for my own ears went off and I slowly rose from my bed, careful not to wake Kaoru. He stirred slightly as he did every night before settling down again. I slipped my dressing gown over my shoulders and tip toed out of the room and down the hallway. I nudged Ran's bedroom door open and stepped into the pitch black room. A frown spread onto my face as I saw the curtains that were still open and the moonlit that spread across the undisturbed bed.

I walked further into the room and looked around for any sign of my daughter and found nothing but a folded note on the bedside table.

_Dear mum,_

I know you'll find this before anyone else. I've known about your habit of checking in on me for years and I'm so sorry for the shock you'll receive on this particular morning.

I've left. You never knew but I've been seeing a boy for a month now and we've left to get married. I don't know when I'll be in contact or returning so please don't worry too much.

I'm so sorry.

I love you.  
Ran x

I forgot how to breathe. My baby girl was gone. I didn't know when I'd see her or if she was safe. A tear rolled down my cheek. She'd gone to marry a boy she'd known for a month...

"Kaoru...KAORU!" My words started quietly but soon became screams as I repeated my husbands name over and over and raced to our bedroom. He lay asleep on his side of the bed. "KAORU! PLEASE!" I shook him violently as I began to panic.

"Wha...Eri, whats wrong?" His voice was deep with sleep and he slowly rose and rubbed his face in an attempt to wake himself.

"Kaoru, she's gone." I began to sob as I pressed the letter against his chest. He spent a few minutes reading then rereading the paper before looking at me with shocked eyes and hurrying out of the room. I hugged and sobbed into a pillow as I listened to him slam the door of Ran's bedroom open then a minute later step back into our own and hold me close.

"What do we do?" His voice shook with anger and sadness but he tried to keep it even for my sake.

"I honestly don't know" I cried into his shoulder. No one tells you what to do when something like this happens. There's no parent's guidebook. "I think the first thing we should do is try to get information on this boy. We'll ask the guys and Ayano. Someone has to know something." I pulled back and tried to come up with a plan of action.

****

It was five in the morning and we'd woken all but two of the exhosts up. Luckily Mori never left Honey's side so Mori could speak for both of them when he said he didn't know. Kyouya...we'd have to ask him later. Tamaki and Haruhi had interogated Ayano and none of them knew anything and Hikaru was currently pacing our kitchen trying to think of places they could have gone. At least him being here was keeping Kaoru slightly calmer. I on the other hand was stressing out in my head and trying hard not to show it, it was only when Hikaru hugged me when I realised I wasn't that good an actress.

"It'll be fine. I'll find her. After all it is my fault she's such a rebel." Hikaru chuckled trying not to show his sorrow and slight guilt. Well that makes two bad actors then.

"It's not your fault. I should have noticed something sooner. We'll all work together to get her back." I placed a hand on his cheek to comfort my brother in law. He may be tough and mischevious on the outside but on the inside he loved that girl as his own and was falling to pieces. "Now stop worrying about me and go make sure Kaoru's okay. If he starts to lose it then I don't know what I'll do."

Hikaru flashed a smile before running out of the room.

Ran, we will find you. No matter what the cost.

* * *

Pleeeeease review :D Thanks for all my reviews so far I'm glad you guys like the story! Sorry for not updating sooner, I've had an english exam and been ill. But on a brighter note it's been snowing and it's only November so I'm praying for snow on my birthday because it would be a dream come true. Love you all :)

Jenny xx


	20. Honeymoon

It was done. We'd gone behind everyone's backs and got married to each other.

Dad would kill me, mum would stay silent, and uncle Hikaru...I think he'd be a mixture of both. But I put the image of their reactions out of my mind as I lay next to my sleeping husband. The b&b was cheap, as was the wedding but in that moment I wouldn't want to be anywhere else.

He'd been gentle with me as I experienced the physical side of love for the first time, kissing me gently and whispering sweet nothings. I felt like the luckiest girl in the world and as I gazed at my husband's sleeping form and smiled with pride. Surely mum and dad couldn't be too angry. Akio was a nice,intelligent and gentle man, sure we rushed into this a little but doesn't everyone? A sigh escaped my lips as I got up and snuck into the bathroom.

As I examined my face in the mirror I spotted the numerous love bites that decorated my neck and blushed. He may have been gentle but he had still been slightly wild. I leant over to splash my face with water and as I rose up again I was shocked by the reflection of Akio. He was fully dressed and smiling.

"I'm just going out for a bit. I'll be back in no time." He leant over and kissed my cheek.

"Do you have to? It is our honeymoon afterall." I could barely hold back the desperation in my voice. Where on earth did he have to go on our honeymoon? And alone may I add!

"I just have to pop out to meet a man I work with. And I'll buy you a proper wedding ring while I'm out. That cheap thing won't do for MY wife." He gave me a grin before kissing me again and leaving. He better return soon.

Why did I agree to this? Everyone I know told me this guy was trouble. But the desperation of money being low and having children to feed made me ignore them. My wife would kill me when she found out. But it was just a loan right? I steal a bit of money from the business I work for, then he pays it back double. It was simple. But any simple task has conciquences. I was putting my job, family and myself at risk. I hope Ino is okay. I'd promised her a day out and she was now waiting in the car far away from here. My sweet forteen year old. Her face broke into my mind. She looked so much like her mother, with dark blue eyes and long brunette curls.

"Nice of you to come." A smooth voice rang through my ears and I turned to face the man it belonged to. The alleyway was dark but I could see him clearly. His green eyes hid every secret and emotion he held, his face hard to read. Red hair was slicked back and he wore a formal suit. "Have you got the money?"

"Y-yes." My voice shook involuntarily. Just the sight of him made me realise I shouldn't have listened. I handed the breifcase over to him and he inspected it carefully.

"Nice, very nice. A little under what I asked for though." His eyes rose to me again and for the first time I saw an emotion. Anger.

"I couldn't get anymore. That's all the was in the safe and I was nearly caught." I backed away slowly. All I wanted was to be back in my car with my baby girl.

"Sadly, that excuse just isn't enough. I'll have to find another way of getting that money." In seconds he'd pulled out a gun and shot me in both shoulders. I fell against the wall and could only sit there as he walked over, took the keys from my pocket and walked away again.

In a minute he was back with my daughter at gun point. She remained silent just as her mother and I had taught her. We lived in a rough part of town and knew there was I good chance one of us would end up in that situation.

"Now, I'm going to take your girlie with me. I think she'll make quite a bit of money, with her having such a nice body and all." I watched in horror I as he ran a hand over her breasts, down her stomach and finishing between her legs. She shook and tears began to escape her eyes. She was no longer following what she had been taught, the shock and terror had stopped her ability to speak.

"Now, girlie, say goodbye to your dad." Both his hand and the gun moved, his hand now covering her mouth and the gun pointing in my direction. There was a bang and the world turned black around me. And the last think I saw was my wife and girls and I whispered a silent "I love you."


	21. Home

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_I'm so sorry for taking so long T_T Had writers block then got introduced to hetalia and that's taken over my Ouran obsession. So I didn't get snow on my birthday but did the day after(fml) and there was still slow around for christmas :) Am no longer Kaoru due to Hikaru dumping me but am now Mori because my Honey will love me forever :D Anyway I apologise again for the wait, as I said it's due to Hetalia, writers block, birthday, christmas and lots of exams. Blame Italy and Germany for being so damn cute together. Enjoy~_

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After returning home, Akio told me that the house was ready for us to go to and live in.

I'd be lieing if I said I wasn't relieved, this b&b was nice and all but it was beginning to feel like the small space was choking me. So within twenty minutes we'd packed up, paid and were heading off.

The house was near ruin. Paper peeled from the wall and mould and soaked carpets surrounded the walls. All my expectations dropped and my eyes grew wide at the sight of my new home. Another clue that I should have run back home. But a strange sense of love and loyalty kept the smile on my face and hid the disappointment.

Before I could come to terms with my new life a girl clad in just a black lace bra and denim hot pants.

"So this is our new 'mother'?" The girl that looked only a year older than me said. Akio gave a swift nod then led me to a kitchen diner. What was this place? Who was that girl? What did she mean by 'mother'? All my questions were answered as I was pushed into a rough dining chair.

Akio stood over me with a new sturn expression that I had never seen before. This side of him as completely new to me.

"Now, your job is to watch over and control the girls downstairs. They may be a bit antisocial to start with but they'll eventually open up to you." he gave me my instructions before taking my hand and leading me to a unpolished door that led to the basement. He pushed me inside before closing the door swiftly and I listened to the lock turn.

Terror ran through my mind as I carefully descended the stairs in darkness, quiet conversations could be heard that fell silent as I entered the musky room. Girls dressed similarly to the one before all turned to look at me.

"That's her." The girl from before stated before advancing towards me. I slowly stepped backwards and hit a wall.

"Who are you? What's going on?" What had happened? What had my stupid decision led me to?

"You're our new 'mother'. The last one didn't last as long as most others but I've got a good feeling about you. You seem like a decent person. You see what Akio does is marry girls that will keep his prostitutes in line and comfort them into thinking it's all okay. He tends to go for rich girls so he can take some of their money. He's not the good guy he made you think he was."

The information was too much. She was lieing...wasn't she? But then why were they here? Through all my confusion I noticed a young girl curled up in the corner sobbing. Blood stains her clothes and her slim body is shaken by each sob. My maturnal instincts kick in and I circle her with my arms. Eventually the tears stop and she falls limp on my shoulder, asleep. I have to get these girls out of here.

* * *

Each search party has resulted in no Ran. Each day was passing at a torturous pace-the silence ripping into my heart more and more each second. Each phone call brings a flash of hope only to be shot down, each knock at the door, each passing stranger. Kaoru is trying to be strong, for both me and Hikaru. But I know the burden is becoming too much for him, seeing those he loves hurting so much and bottling up his own pain.

And what makes it worse is that money is disappearing from our bank accounts without explanation. The police are looking into this mystery too, maybe it'll lead us to Ran.

But all I can do now is pray and show my husband my love. Dear Lord, please bring her back safe.


	22. Family

_Note 1: omg I'm sooo sorry it's been this long since my last update! Hetalia has pretty much taken over my life and my ouran obsession and I just lost interest in my writing. *sigh* I don't blame you guys if you have forgotten the story and lost interest because tbh I can't remember most of it myself and am struggling to think where I was going with it. Sooo yeah blame the lack of updates and Spamano being so cute and exams stressing me out._

_Note 2: Excuse any spelling mistakes, I had to reset my computer for the second time and thus have no office and am working on wordpad(which has no spell check)._

* * *

Light streamed in from the small barred window above us. A long night of conversations had informed me of Akio's past wives, his crimes and the horrors each girl had girl that had ever entered this house had been used and none had escaped 's three wives before me had each been killed for the same reason, he'd bled their parent's money dry, and now it was my turn. Images of my parents flooded my mind, what were they doing now? Had they noticed missing money? Were they looking for me?

Removing the thin arm draped over my waist, I slowly sat up. Girls lay on whatever they could, broken beds, worn matresses, stained sofas, thin blankets and in some cases the dusty floor. Some shivered, other pulled eachother close for warmth. Each held a miserable past that had broken and strengthened them at the same time.

"He'll be down for you soon." A half-asleep voice informed me from the shifted slightly so I could see her clearer. Her blonde hair fell in wild waves over her shoulders and neck, amber eyes hazy with sleep. "Although you'll often sleep down here, you'll still get the honour of eating with the bastard." _The Bastard_. Kairi's name for Akio behind his 'd been one of the first girls he'd dragged into this business, having found her on the street. He'd lied to her, saying he would give her food and shelter until she could afford her own place or find somewhere else only to lock her away, only to be brought out, shoved into a van and made to sell herself, her dignity over and over.

"I want to get all of you out of here, no matter what it takes." I mumbled, just loud enough to be heard. Kairi snorted before pausing, thinking out her reply.

"You know what? You're different to the others. They never let go of the good they claimed to see in him, calling us all liars and sluts. But you...you actually care...Alright! I actually think you'll be the one to do this." She reached into her red bra and pulled out a tiny bottle, blushing as she looked at it. "It's poison, just enough to knock him out for around 10 hours, slip it into his coffee and don't worry about him drinking it all because he always does. Hey don't look at me like that, a guy that often visits the club we work at claims he loves me and will do anything for me to spend my life with him and only him so he gave me this but we're not allowed anywhere near his food so you need to do it instead. Please! We want normal lives. Like any other girls!" Her eyes pleaded and looked on the verge of tears but turned bright as I took the bottle and slipped it into my own bra.

"Okay, I'll do this, get the others up and ready to leave." I whispered as the door cracked open revealing my _husband_. I gave her a stern look and a wink before turning and following him out and into the kitchen. Toast and orange juice was set before me as he put his own plate of toast and mug of hot coffee down.

"How was your first night?" His voice sounded too cheerful, as if I'd been in some luxury suite not a damp cellar. I took a small bite of warm toast as my mind fought between a serious and sarcastic reply.

"The girls are very welcoming, they made me feel at home." I replied honestly. Although the conditions had been awful, I actually enjoyed the company. Akio gave a gentle smile as he got up to get the butter from the fridge, his drowning toast apparently didn't have enough. _Now or never,_ I thought as I quickly took the bottle from my top, unscrewed the lid and tipped the contents into his coffee. He began to turn just as I pulled the bottle away and hid it under the table.

"You aren't eating! You'll waste away! And I don't want a skeleton wife." He joked as he sat back in his seat and began to drink his coffee. I answered by taking a large chunk out of the cooling toast. "There's more bread and some cereal in the cupboard as well."

Within minutes his coffee was gone and his eyelids were beginning to droop.

"I'm so tired...what have you done to me?" His accusation was slirred and quiet as he slowly slumped down onto the floor. With quiet steps I walked towards him and took the keys from his pocket. He made no reaction against it so I ran towards the cellar door, unlocked it and ran down, gathering the girls before running infront of the mini stampede towards the front door. Kairi checked the kitchen to see Akio was still unconsious as we all made our exit.

I don't think I've ever seen so many appalled people, not that I blamed them, I imagine I'd look the same if I saw a load of half naked girls run down the pavement manicly. Although the place wasn't completely familiar, I remember Uncle Kyouya had some secret police stationed in a nearby building and led the girls towards it.

"RAN?" A scream came from somewhere to the right and before I knew it brunette hair was bobbing beside me. "What the hell is going on!" I turned to see a half hysterical half laughing Ayano running beside me.

"I'm so glad to see you! It's a long story and right now I need to get to some police." I panted in reply. Man this tomboy was out of shape.

"Well we all know I'm a faster runner so I'll go ahead and we'll meet you halfway!" She laughed aloud as she sped ahead of me. I honestly envied her sometimes. Lucky cow.

Quite a few more miles and a few minutes later, one of the secret police was jogging up to meet me. As I stopped I couldn't help my whole story tumbling out. He listened closely and asked the address so he could arrest Akio, luckily one of the girls had made it her job to memorise this detail and soon a whole squad was driving past.

"Oh my God, Ran, I had no idea all this was happening. You need to get home, everyone's worried sick, come on." She grabbed my arm and began to drag me away.

"WAIT!" I cried. She dropped my arm and looked confused as I walked over to the half dressed girls. "You guys are coming home with me. From there we can get those who have family back to them and the rest can stay as long as they wish." Smiles spread across all fifteen of the girls as they began to follow me and Ayano.

* * *

A great yawn erupted from me as I rested my head on my folded arms. No one had slept peacefully last night. I'd been up working trying to keep my mind off Ran, Kaoru and Hikaru had been out searching again and the other ex hosts were discussing the next locations to be searched. This morning I woke up in front of the fireplace amongst my papers, a blanket had been put over me during the night. I'd gone through the house to find Kyouya in one of the guest bedrooms, Haruhi and Tamaki sat against each other on one sofa, Mori sat on the other with Honey spread on his lap,all asleep, and Kaoru and Hikaru drinking coffee in the kitchen with dark circles under their eyes. And that's the point that I sat down and took up the position I was in now.

"You know you boys shouldn't drink that. You go hyperatcive...Make me one please?" Any extra energy would be warmly welcomed into my system. I heard the front door open and looked round to see Ayano grinning at me. "What are you up to Ayano? Your parents are just in the next room!"

"I'm not up to anything Aunty Eri! Infact I bring something good." She said before gesturing to something outside. A slightly timid looking red head stepped into the house and it took a moment to register who it was.

"RAN!" The boy's heads snapped up at the exclamaition and their eyes went wide as I rushed towards her and clung to her. "Where have you been?" Tears rolled down both our faces as I held her cheeks, studying her.

"I'll explain in a moment mum but right now I need to feed and clothe some people." A questioning frown took hold of my face as Ran gestured for whoever it was out there to come inside. Soon enough my hallway held a group of half dressed young ladies.

* * *

Within two weeks most of the girls had gone, leaving Kairi and the small girl that I had held on my first and only night there. We lay on my bed laughing and making jokes while I sorted out some clothes for the day. A swift knock sounded from the front door, soon followed by a lot of desperate calls from the visiter. Confused looks were exchanged so we made our way down the stairs. The young girl gave a look of shock before running and throwing herself at the guest. Tears welled up in both their eyes. The old woman thanked my mum over and over, shaking her hand then led the girl out to her car. Another family reunited.

"And then there were two." Kairi smiled and casually wrapped an arm over my shoulders. "I'll leave as soon as I have the money to set myself up somewhere, so don't think you'll be getting rid of me anytime soon."

"What about your family?" It was a topic she avoided at all costs but I needed to know.

"Well, lets just say my step dad isn't the best person in the world and he threw me out and threatened to kill me if I ever showed my face again. So...I have no family." She shrugged and flopped back down onto my bed.

"Well, you're welcome here as long as you want, you're like a sister to me now and mum thinks of you as an adopted daughter anyway. So we'll be your family."

"That'd be nice."

* * *

And that's how it went. Kairi got in contact with the man that had fallen in love with her and, after a lot of convincing, she started to go out with him and she eventually moved out when he asked her to marry him. I told mum the whole story and she in return told me of her life. After that I was relunctant to leave so mum bought me the house next door and I began to work from home. In the end I was just as successful as my dad and eventually I learnt to trust enough to let a man into my life. Within three years we married and I'm now expecting our first child.

Mum, I hope I did you proud.

* * *

_I'm sorry this is so rushed, but I wanted to end it so I didn't forget about it again. Hope you've enjoyed it and please review with any requests(though I'm fussy with pairings so I'll only do ones I like and can work with) and ideas, or just to tell me how I can improve and what you enjoyed. Until next time!_

_Jenny x_


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